Your profile has about three seconds to earn a second look. It's not about being the most attractive person on the app — it's about being the most legible: easy to read, easy to imagine talking to, easy to swipe right on. That's a solvable problem, not a genetics problem.

Photos: the 80% that does the work

  1. Lead with a clear, smiling face. No sunglasses, no hat, no group photo where you're a mystery. Good light beats an expensive camera every time.
  2. Show a full-body shot. Leaving it out reads as hiding something. Own how you look.
  3. Show a life. One photo doing something you actually enjoy — cooking, climbing, a gig, travel. It gives people something to ask about.
  4. Add one social proof photo with friends (but not as the first — and not where you're the least attractive one).
  5. Cut the clutter: no gym-mirror selfies, no fish, no car, no heavy filters. They're clichés for a reason.
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The lazy-genius test

Ask a friend (ideally a woman, if you're dating women) to pick your photos and order them. You're a bad judge of your own pictures — everyone is. Outsource it.

Bio: specific beats impressive

The goal of a bio isn't to list your virtues — it's to give someone an easy opening line. Specific, slightly playful details do that. Vague adjectives do not.

  • Kills matches: "Just ask," "Work hard play hard," "Not here for games," "6ft since apparently it matters." Generic or bitter — pick neither.
  • Gets matches: "I'll judge your coffee order and then order the same thing," "Currently trying to make sourdough that isn't a brick," "Will lose to you at Mario Kart and be a sore loser about it."
  • Give them a hook — a question they can answer or a detail they can tease you about.

Prompts: answer like a person, not a résumé

Prompts are where personality lives. Don't waste them on one-word answers. Aim for a little humour, a little honesty, and a clear opening for a reply.

Prompt: "The way to win me over is…" → "Have a strong, specific opinion about something low-stakes. Best sandwich in the city? I need the full argument."
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The energy that repels

Negativity is a match-killer. Lists of what you don't want, complaints about the app, or "no drama" all signal past drama. Keep it warm and forward-looking. Talk about what you're into, not what you're against.

Then actually talk like a human

A great profile only earns you the conversation — you still have to have it. Open with something from their profile, not "hey." And if texting isn't your strength, see common texting mistakes and green and red flags on dating apps.

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Profile checklist

Checklist

  • First photo: clear, smiling, solo, good light
  • At least one full-body and one 'doing something' photo
  • No sunglasses/hat-only/fish/car/mirror-selfie clichés
  • Bio is specific and gives an easy opening line
  • Prompts show humour and personality, not one-word answers
  • Zero negativity or lists of dealbreakers

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